If You’ve Ever Lost Someone, Remember This One Thing

If you ever feel like you’ve lost someone, remember you never had them to begin with. Love does not mean possession.

Have you ever had an experience that was really painful and then down the road come to realize that without that experience, you wouldn’t be as happy as you are right in this moment?

What about the relationship that ended with a person you weren’t ready to let go of.

And maybe now you’re laying next to someone you’re madly in love with who you wouldn’t have otherwise ended up with?

Future pace yourself to that moment, be in it now.

In your moments of pain or uncertainty, ask yourself, when has my pain ever led me off path?

Perhaps it’s like Rumi says:

“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.” – Rumi

All we have is each moment to be fully expressed, love fully, and to accept others for who they are.

You cannot lose what isn’t yours. What you can own is your experience, your lessons.

Embrace those lessons with a full and open heart. Set your sights on living an abundant life full of joyful memories, pleasure and moments of ecstasy.

When you’re living this way, you can experience happiness 99% of the time, even when you’re in solitude. Sometimes especially when you’re in solitude.

Don’t be afraid to take a step towards something because you’re afraid you’ll lose it, because you’ll never truly have it anyways.

This is all just an experience, perhaps even a training, before we transcend to the next level, who knows where we go next?

This material world, and all of us in it, we’re all just an illusion. Just like time.

by
Sheleana Aiyana is the founder of Rising Woman, a global community with over 3 million readers dedicated to healing, self-discovery, and conscious relationships. An international best-selling author, Sheleana’s work is informed by her training in somatic healing, inherited family trauma, and Imago couples therapy. As a writer, mother, and wife, she weaves her own transformative life experiences with the wisdom of nature. Her teachings guide others toward deeper intimacy, self-awareness, and connection with the natural world, inspiring them to heal old wounds and cultivate love in all areas of life.
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